One day I was visiting at my friend Terry’s house when she opened the fridge, pulled out a bottle of light cologne and sprayed some on her wrists. Wow, what a lovely, novel pick-me-up. I had to try it. I was accustomed to keeping aloe in the fridge for first-aid emergencies and my son likes to keep his sunscreen in the fridge, but I had never thought of keeping cologne in there. Since it’s so delightful, it’s tempting to use too much, so I make sure to use an extremely light scent. My favorites are La Prairie Sea Energy; Lovely, by Sarah Jessica Parker; and Energizing Aroma Tonic by Lancome.

I set small goals for myself at the beginning of each day. Before I started goal-setting, I would feel overwhelmed by projects, tasks and errands “looming” over me. I started making written lists, including even the smallest tasks like, “wash the dishes” or “mail letters.” Writing everything down not only prioritizes and organizes the tasks, but it gives me a place to start, even if it’s in the kitchen washing dishes, As I finish each item on the list, I cross it off. Some days I don’t get to every single item, but because I include even the little things, I have lots of crossed-off items at the end of the day. It’s very gratifying to see how much I’ve accomplished when I look at the list. Washing dishes, doing laundry, mailing letters, making a deposit at the bank are all boring little chores and it’s easy to forget about them once they’re finished, overlooking the chance to give yourself credit for a job well done. I love to look at all the crossed off items at the end of the day and say, “Wow, I got a lot done today!” I move the leftover items to the next day, always making sure to get the most important things done first, if possible. Now I actually look forward to my lists – the longer the better – because the sense of accomplishment is a natural high.

Maybe it’s my journalistic instinct, but I love talking to strangers. I’ll strike up a conversation in line at the post office, airport, grocery store, wherever! People love to talk about themselves and most people will tell me their entire life stories in the first five minutes and I’m happy to hear it. I try to learn something from them and usually I do. If the person is upbeat and positive, I soak that in. If they’re down and negative, I try to say something nice to turn them around, but if that doesn’t work, I appreciate my happy life all the more and remind myself that I have so much to be grateful for. When I was quite young, in my 20′s, I read a very important line in a book. It said, “Friendly people are lucky people.” The book went on to explain that people who engage others in conversations can find themselves in a situation that can benefit them. I have had hundreds of incidents that prove this to be true. I’ve been a voice over artist for almost 30 years (I do the talking part of commercials) and have met many broadcast producers just by striking up conversations with total strangers who turn out to be in a position to hire me. Of course I still adhere to all the cautions: don’t get in a car with a stranger, meet in a public place, don’t give out personal information. Even if you’re shy, what’s the harm in talking to the person next to you? I always think, “The worst that can happen is they’ll ignore me and that’s their problem, not mine.”

One trap many people fall into thanks to magazines, movies and television, is comparing ourselves to others. We engage in all kinds of negative self talk like, “These jeans make my butt look big,” or “I�ll never be as skinny as her.” I finally realized that none of that matters. What matters to me is that I look the best I can look. I started raising my own bar, not to anyone else’s standard, but to my own. I decided to eat a healthier diet, add more veggies into my daily meals, work out more – skip rope and skip the excuses! I’m not a movie star, so I stopped comparing myself to them.

If you’ve never baked bread from scratch, you’re missing a wonderful stress reliever. There’s just something cathartic about burying yourself up to the elbows in dough and kneading, kneading, kneading. Follow the recipe directions for baking….or don�t! Bread Baking

If you do choose to actually bake the bread you’ve so lovingly kneaded, you get the added bonus of a house filled with a mouthwatering, old-fashioned aroma that will make you feel as if you’ve been transported to Paris or Rome. Caution: fresh bread is among the most tempting things in life – for me anyway. Remember portion control!

Remember the 60′s? I do. Peace signs, “Make Love Not War,” “Flower Power.” This is actually about flowers, not about the 60�s, but it’s fun to reminisce every once in a while. Flowers are nature’s gift to us. They’re perfect! They come in dazzling colors and eye-popping styles. Not to mention some of the most luscious aromas on the planet. So why not enjoy them? I used to think buying flowers for myself was too indulgent, too much of a splurge. So if I didn’t happen to have a flower delivery from some secret admirer, my vases were bare. While I was living in Los Angeles, I had a tiny, one-bedroom apartment in a trendy neighborhood with a fabulous view: the balcony and windows of the apartment across the alley. To add cheer to my surroundings (and give myself something to look at other than that balcony), I got into the habit of bringing home fresh flowers every week. Nothing outrageously fancy or expensive, just a nice bunch of sunflowers for $10.00 or a small arrangement of mixed, multi-colored beauties. I always kept it under $15.00. That’s only about three lattes…and the flowers last longer!

There’s the old expression, “It takes more muscles to frown than to smile,” though no one is quite sure where that information came from. I’m a smiley person by nature, but even if it takes some effort, smiles tend to earn more positive attention. There have been studies done where subjects are shown pictures of people wearing different expressions and the subjects almost always mimic the expression in the picture. In fact, in one study, the subjects were instructed to adopt the opposite expression (if the picture showed a smile, the subject was instructed to frown), and they had difficulty achieving the opposite. I’ve done my own little tests, where I go around smiling at everyone I see and the reactions are mixed, but they’re almost always positive. I usually get a smile or a wink in return, sometimes an unwelcome leer and every once in a while, a dirty look. The outgoing people will sometimes talk to me with a variety of comments from, “What are you so happy about?” and “You have a beautiful smile,” to “Is something funny?” and “It must be nice to be so happy.” And I think to myself, “Yes, it is nice to be so happy and so much easier than being unhappy.” I believe that thoughts influence reality, so if I think I’m happy, I will be happy. So far it’s working.

One of the standard jokes about “getting old” pokes fun at people who’ve never heard of the bands the teenagers listen to, like the Black-Eyed Peas. If you said “Black-Eyed who?” you might want to get with the times. I don’t necessarily listen to the music teenagers listen to, but I at least recognize some of the names and that makes me seem more “hip” than some almost-50 moms. I also watch the news or read the newspaper every day. People who are oblivious to current events can seem out of touch or self absorbed. Living in the present moment, knowing what’s going on around me and not obsessing about the past have contributed to my youthfulness. I can talk about almost any topic to anyone, regardless of their age. Teenagers especially enjoy the fact that I know what’s going on in their world and they frequently comment that I “don’t seem like a mom,” but more like one of them. Keeping up with the changing world also helps me keep up on the latest breakthroughs in anti-aging products, services and procedures. My friends marvel that it seems as if I’m always the first to know the latest information. And now I’m sharing it with you!

An important Aging Backwards tip is to wear clothes that fit properly. Up until about two years ago, I always wore baggy tops or jackets with short skirts because I thought my legs were among my best features and since they’re thin, I’ll look thin all over. I couldn’t have been more wrong! Several of my friends kept bugging me to wear fitted clothes, but I was very resistant to the idea. I complained that I didn’t like the way the jeans were so low cut and I stubbornly wore my old high-waisted Guess jeans, which I had paid a lot of money for, thank you very much. Well, one day I took my son out for a smoothie while wearing the aforementioned high-waisted jeans. As we were getting back into the car, my teenage son said to me, “Mom, those jeans make you look old.” Well, that’s all I needed to hear! Every single pair of those expensive jeans went straight into the Goodwill pile. My friend Kathy, the jeans expert, took me shopping the following week. After trying on at least 20 different brands, I finally found a pair I liked, even though it took me a while to get used to the low-rise feeling. A funny thing happened while we were jeans shopping. I met a woman who was probably in her mid 50′s who was also trying on every brand of low-rise jeans. She told me that her husband jokingly threatened to divorce her if she didn’t get rid of her old-fashioned jeans.

So now I had the jeans, but I was still wearing those baggy shirts and jackets. My friend insisted that I get some shirts that actually fit and showed off my figure. It took a while for me to accept the fact that the fitted clothes made me look thinner, not heavier. It finally sunk in when I went to visit a friend I hadn’t seen for about a year. When I showed up in my new low-rise jeans and tight shirt, she said, “You look great! Have you lost weight?” I had been dieting and had lost six pounds. “Yes, thank you for noticing,” I replied proudly. “How much did you lose, about 45 pounds?” she innocently asked. I was in shock, to say the least. “Well, I’ve lost six pounds, actually,” I told her. That was all the proof I needed to realize that the way I had been dressing was obviously making me look much bigger than I really was!

Aging Backwards is on TV! Jackie went live on the Daytime television show on the NBC affiliate in Tampa, Florida and will be a regular correspondent. Daytime is a daily show on News Channel 8 featuring information and advice on personal finance, food, home improvement and now, Aging Backwards. We’ll keep you posted on when it will be airing. Don’t worry if you don’t live in Tampa – starting in September, Daytime will be shown in 31 markets!